Worth The Wait

Two days after I wrote that last post I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl! The labor went really well! And perhaps one day I'll write it out. As I type this she is asleep on my shoulder while I rock her.

She is perfect in every way and my heart could not be more full of love for her. For a long time I didn't think I would make a good mom. I've worried about being inadequate. I think I will probably always worry about that. But I'm realizing that's not always a bad thing; it means I'm conscious of it and always striving to do my best for her. In the past eleven weeks I've already made mistakes but I'm trying and learning! Before she arrived I wasn't worried about the taking care of a baby part. I thought   I had spent lots of time looking after various babies over the years. But this baby threw me for a loop!  Lots of what I thought I knew, or worked in the past for other babies, was true for her.

From breastfeeding jaundice, to not gaining weight fast enough, to discovering she has a lip tie and colic, and realizing she's a "catnap baby".... I've learned a lot and am slowly feeling like I'm figuring things out. Maybe.

The lack of sleep, tears (hers and mine), the not knowing what to do... it's all worth it and I wouldn't change a thing. We waited a long time for her and I can't imagine our life without her now. Every day I look at her and can't believe she exists and is ours to love.

So that's where you'll find me; in awe of my beautiful baby. I don't seem to have a lot I want to blog about consistently right now but I seem to have no problem over sharing on Instagram. You can find me on there as: carisle