Since the very beginning, Jon and I have been in the agreement that if we ever had kids it would be because we both felt we really wanted to. When asked, we're careful about how we explain our decision about not having kids. Some people can get very passionate about it. We try to never say "we're never having kids", as sometimes people change their minds or you find yourself pregnant and you realize it's meant to be. We know that if we found ourselves pregnant we would be overjoyed. But we've maintained the premise that if it happened, it happened; but we're not trying for a baby.
 |
| Me and my dollies |
It's not that we hate kids. Sometimes that's the second question after "When are you having kids?".
We haven't not had kids because we are selfish. Another comment we sometimes get. We don't know if we'd actually make very good parents.
We may wake up one day and regret being all alone. But is that really a deciding factor in having a baby?
You've clearly not thought this through or know what you're thinking. We have talked about this for years. For hours. Perhaps even thought about it to the point of too much.
Yesterday we received another criticism for our child-free marriage. And although it came from Jon's dementia suffering Nana, every time someone questions us it makes me rethink it. Not that I think "Oh no what if we're wrong?" But just re-evaluating what we think.
Looking back from where were 7 years ago when we first started dating, we've come a long way. And I think there are some moments when we're waiting for the stick to change that for a few seconds there's a tiny part of us that hopes it's positive.
Perhaps one day in the next few years all our anxieties over having kids will be put to rest and we'll want to add to our family. But for now we're enjoying being just the two of us.
